Games Christmas Tinner For One

With the Xbox 1 and PlayStation 4 expected to sell in droves this Christmas it was really just a matter of time until somebody conceived of a way for allowing people to cut out all of Christmas’s exhausted and unloved traditions (Christmas dinner; family-time) and allow them to focus on what really matters.

The website for aptly named gaming retailer Game is offering their customers the Christmas tinner, the revolutionary dinner-in-a-can designed to last from morning scrambled eggs and bacon all the way through a traditional turkey lunch and into Christmas pudding.

The 9 layer monstrosity retails at £1.99 (cheap and convenient? Is there anything wrong with this product?) from the Game website, although they are currently out of stock (were they ever actually in stock?).

Regardless of the tinner’s credentials as a genuine product it has certainly drummed up internet interest, and whilst this is surely in a large part due to its novelty genuine interest is most likely present as well. According to Game themselves 43% of gamers intend to spend the majority of the Christmas period on their consoles, but surely they wouldn’t forgo Christmas dinner? Well sadly not, according to research done by Domino’s pizza gamers will do almost anything so they can keep playing: nearly half of male gamers have turned down sex, 20% of female gamers have missed weddings and hen do’s, and 1 in 7 console addicts have relieved themselves in a plastic bottle.

In the presence of dire statistics such as these Game’s Christmas tinner suddenly becomes an item of social commentary so sad it’s laughable. Take hope in the fact that the Christmas tinner is a marketing tool that exists purely to create brand awareness through disgust and amazement. We haven’t sunk quite that far… yet.